Are you influencing people without even realizing it?
Recently, in a work situation, I noticed the leader of another department was so focused on their own way of thinking and doing, that they did not notice the heavy and hard impact of their actions on their team.
At the time, I thought to myself that if I were in a leadership role reporting to that person, that I wouldn’t stick around for long, and while I was there, I would invest even more into supporting and uplifting my staff.
Mirrors and workouts
The other week, I was in a workout class with an instructor who perhaps jives with people who experience motivation in a different way than I do.
A militaristic, punitive style just doesn’t do it for me. More bees with honey and all that.
The instructor is clearly passionate about what they do, and may still be building their experience with reading the room and learning different ways to motivate others.
I’m sure you can relate when I say that sometimes, we are so used to our own way of experiencing life that we can forget the many other ways those around us do. I’ve heard it said – and maybe you have too – that no one experiences a learning experience in the same way.
We all bring the lens (think sunglasses!) of our OWN life experience when we’re engaged in something. And that’s beautiful. It also means it’s worthwhile paying attention to how we and others respond and affect each other.
Coming back to the workout class…
It felt like such a struggle. It was not feeling fun. I didn’t appreciate the instructor’s style at all.
I was pushing hard for myself, but the class felt grating and demotivating. It took a great deal of personal effort to stay present and positive and motivated in the class.
But I decided I was simply going to enjoy this class despite its leadership.
Once I brought myself back into that constructive place, I noticed a lot of others in the class were really struggling, including two people behind me.
In that moment, I realized this situation mirrored that other department’s situation from work, where a harsh and punitive leader was having the opposite-than-intended effect.
I had a choice, and an opportunity
In that moment, I noticed the folks immediately behind me were following my lead, not the instructor’s. The reason I noticed that is that I gave myself a few more seconds to recover in between sets, and the moment I jumped back into it, so did they.
That’s when I realized that I was already having an impact on people. Which also meant I had the opportunity to do exactly what I’d thought about a workplace scenario.
That I would finish the class, and while I was there, I would invest even more into supporting and uplifting the people who were following me.
Taking your influence seriously
And so in that workout class, I took that leadership responsibility seriously. I took note of how the folks behind me were doing, and used my whole mind-body-spirit state to uplift them and show them they could do this. That they weren’t alone to struggle through.
All of which brings us back to my original question to you.
Is it possible that you’re influencing others around you without even realizing it?
And now that you know that it can happen, what’s different for you? And how might you make a small change for the better?