Getting Unsubscribed For Being “Other”

It happened yet again. I’ve had this blog and related newsletter for years, and just like every other time that I’ve talked about having mixed heritage in my newsletter, I had multiple unsubscribes. This happens EVERY time.

This may not seem like a big deal for most people, and people say not to let it bother me, but it makes me feel sad every time. Because it’s such an obvious pattern, six years in.

This may not seem particularly career-related, except that it is.

That’s because the underlying reasons the unsubscribes happen – and the very common reactions I receive when I am open about unsubscribes – are systemic and exist across career, personal and social lines, as many of us live with every day.

Common reactions are, “Well then don’t talk about being mixed,” (so I shouldn’t be able to exist as I am in a space I’ve created?…) or, “Maybe there’s another reason they unsubscribed. People unsubscribe all the time and maybe it’s not because you’re mixed.”

As mentioned, it’s been a really obvious pattern over several years. There are big differences between the regular, random “cleaning up my inbox” types of unsubscribes, and the multiples that happen after every single time some people find out I’m mixed.

The thing is, it’s unlikely that these folks are raging anti-global-majority people. It’s more likely that they’re just used to being comfortable and for them, “difference” is uncomfortable.

See how this relates to work?

I bet many folks can think of a time (or many) you experienced someone “unsubscribing” from you in the workplace because of your being “other.”

By the way – are you curious about the offending content in the newsletter? I wished my subscribers a happy solstice (which was happening the week I sent the newsletter), shared that it’s a culturally and spiritually significant observance for me, and then shared the noodle dish that we always prepare to honour those traditions.

That was it. Then I went on to offer a free how-to for people who want to try out a particular solstice reflection (not culturally specific), and shared the link to the most recent podcast episode I was on (also free). Clearly, me and my noodle recipe are so deeply radical! /Sarcasm

Speaking of food, some food for thought: If your mindset doesn’t make respectful allowance for people in the global majority who have cultural and spiritual beliefs that are different from yours, this isn’t a space in which you will be comfortable. I’m just not for you if this is how you feel; I’m not for everyone and don’t need to be.

And by the way, if you’re curious to hear the podcast I referenced (which talks about burnout, importance vs. urgency and time management, you can find the growing list at and the specific podcast is called “Get Over Yourself by Brandon Davis.”

You can find more career and leadership-related content here. And if you’re into spirituality, you can find that content over here. Finally, if you’re curious about Tarot and other spiritual or self-reflection goods, head over here.

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